On this week’s style masterclass episode, I want to talk to you about something I frequently hear during consultations. Clients tell me “I will get stylish when…” Usually they fill in the blank with they will get stylish when they lose weight, drop a size, or find the perfect clothing item.
They think that being stylish comes from something outside of themselves or that has to do with the shape or size of their body. Style is a feeling you create with your thoughts. Those thoughts and feeling are then reflected in how you dress yourself. Notice my definition of style doesn’t include anything about your body weight, size, or shape. Those are irrelevant to the style equation.
1. When I lose the weight, I will get stylish.
If you are waiting to feel stylish and confident until you lose weight, you are essentially holding your body hostage to some future ideal. Style is available at every size and weight. When you wait to lose some weight, you are telling yourself that the body you have today is not worth dressing well and taking care of. Your makeover transformation does not have to begin with weight loss. I know that a lot of women are socialized to believe that every great makeover story begins with somebody who is half-starved and then is ready for a makeover. This is complete nonsense. Losing weight is not the only type of makeover transformation available to you. In fact, to my gals who have chosen to lose weight as part of this journey. I always tell them it is more likely that you are going to stick to your food protocol or plan, if you are taking care of your heart, mind, and the way you dress your body along the way.
2. When I Drop a Size
When I hear that my clients want to drop a size before investing in their style, we further explore this during our coaching sessions. It usually has something to do with their body shape or the way their clothes are fitting them. They think if they drop a size then automatically their clothes will fit better and they will feel better. Again, feeling style and confident does not come from a tag size. It doesn’t come from filling out some online quiz that tells you you’re an hourglass. Your current body shape and size are worth dressing well right now. Just as they are. There is no need to wait to dress well. The goal is to find clothes that fit your current body. The clothes must conform to your body. You don’t have to do anything to squeeze into a pair of jeans or a bodycon dress.
3. When I Find the Perfect Clothes
There are no perfect clothes. Clothing is part science and mostly art when it comes to construction. Most people you see in magazines or on TV get their clothing tailored. This is important to know because oftentimes we are sold the promise that if we find the perfect jeans or dress or other item of clothing then we’ll feel better about ourselves. We are giving away our power to feel stylish and confident to a pile of fabric. Clothing has no magical abilities.
Stop waiting for someday when you lose weight, drop a size, or find the so-called perfect outfit. Instead, start cultivating a mindset that allows you to feel stylish and confident regardless of your size weight or shape, that is where the real transformation happens. This will allow you to really explore what your your personal style is, and how to show up more confidently regardless of your size and shape. You get to decide how you feel not a tag size.
To learn more about creating style and confidence, take the freestyle class on banishing BS fashion rules.
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